Wednesday, 29 April 2015

The Casanova



“He is a Casanova. I loved him with all my heart and he ditched me. He was popular among girls, many said and I was a fool to ignore them. I was ready to sacrifice everything, leaving behind my world and dreams, just to be with him but he didn't value it. I felt his coldness for some time but never knew he was bestowing warmth on someone else. I thought we would come out triumphant from this rough patch in some time but he opted to move out of it, dumping me and our relationship. Was it so easy for him?”

The night I received this sms from my best friend was horrible. Neither I could answer her question, nor could console her while she was crying profusely over the phone. Her teary eyes and poignant silence disturbed me to the core for the next few days. Many of our friends consoled her stating that she was lucky to have found soon enough. But I knew it wasn't soon enough as she was deeply in love with the guy. However, with each passing day, she recovered and I began developing an immense hatred and loathe for him.

I had met the guy just a few times. I had heard that his job kept him in different cities for days. But the thought that he still returns to this city and might be present somewhere in a nearby lane or coffee shop often provoked me to search for him and beat him to death. To my amazement, once destiny offered me the chance to do so.

One bright morning I found him in the conference room of my office. He was the very client whom I had to attend in the absence of my boss. I had to finalize certain business plans with him. Recognition was evident in both our eyes but he chose to remain calm while I struggled to contain my fury. My profession was demanding amicability as he was an important client but I knew I was failing. We spent 3 to 4 hours discussing the business plans. There were moments when I couldn't contain my rage for Mr. Casanova and there were also times when my thoughts drifted to my heartbroken friend. Overall, I had a terrible meeting in which my personal and professional lives blended horribly and at the end of the meeting I began preparing myself to explain to my boss that why we lost the client.

The next day in the office I received two mails from Mr. Casanova. Anticipating its contents, as I began reading the first one, surprise deluged me with every sentence. The client had appreciated the meeting and was looking forward to take things to the next level. Without any further thoughts I forwarded the mail to my boss and opened the next one. It read:

Hi,

It was very obvious that you would hate me but, until yesterday, I didn't know that your hatred is overpowering you. I know she is one of your dearest friends and her agony has affected you a lot. I never felt the need to explain myself to anyone but henceforth we may need to have more confrontations for official purposes and if my presence always disturbs you, it would be detrimental for both of us, professionally.

You are upset over the fact that I so brutally deceived your friend. I did but I had reasons. We both loved each other dearly but our relationship was moving towards a dead end. It began, as usual, with vows of enduring pains and loving each other unconditionally. We promised sacrifice and compromise for each other’s happiness. However, conditions arose when the “word” sacrifice won over the “act” of sacrifice and that is when it lost its worth.

I have a job which doesn't permit settlement at one destination. Initially, she happily gave in to the idea of moving around with me leaving behind her passion, dreams and career but, with time, she realized that she was losing herself to be with me. Each time she rejected an opportunity that came her way to shape her career, a part of her died silently.

She was regretting her decision and was constantly reminding me about her sacrifice, which, gradually, began appearing to me as a favor. Neither she could let go of her dreams nor could let go of me and this was leading us both to a path of suffering. I don’t blame her at all because it’s not easy to give up on a dream. I felt her agony because, just like me, she is also a free spirited person who aspires to live with an identity and dreams to achieve something. This relationship was holding her back.

You must be thinking that if I had really loved her, I should have settled down with her. But then, perhaps, I would have faced the same distress as her. Don’t you think that only a person content and happy with himself is capable of providing joy to others? Her dream might unleash her inner joy that even I could not, and so I set her free from this relationship that had shackled her. I had to appear a Casanova because no other reason was convincing enough for her to break free of this relationship, in which we both were degrading instead of evolving. My infidelity was the only key to end her obsession for a relation which could never prosper in the long run.  


Yours faithfully
……….


P.S. Please don’t think that I approved the business plan out of mercy over your disturbed being. Although you messed up a little in the meeting, I foresee professional gains.


An hour later, I found myself pondering over the mail from Mr. Casanova and the sms from my friend and a question constantly buzzed in my mind. Was he really a Casanova? They say “there are two sides to every story.” When I discovered both, I ceased to judge as both appeared justified.